[fic] Silent Solitude

[kiyala.livejournal.com]

Title: Silent Solitude
Author: kiyala
Word Count: 774
Pairings: Daryan Crescend / Klavier Gavin
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: swearing and... weirdness.

Wrote this a couple of weeks ago and posted it in my personal LJ because I wasn't sure if I liked it. It's got a weird tone to it (lesson: I shouldn't start fics after midnight) but hey, I still like it so here you guys go :D

Also, a post here just because I feel guilty that all my writing's going to the PW kink meme >__>;

x-posted to gyakuten_saiban and igiari

---

He’s going insane here. He’s really fucking going fucking insane. Fuck fuck fuck fuckfuckfuckfuck. Head spinning with tunes that he has to tap out on his desk. Fingers aching to pluck out a melody. Shoulder feeling uncomfortably empty without the reassuring weight of his guitar. The whole playing-air-guitar-thing is Gavin’s thing. The thought is like a punch in the face. Guitars. Gavin. The two things he’s being pathetic and getting all twitchy without. But he can’t help it now. His right hand automatically falls into the same position it’s always in when he’s holding a pick. Blue picks with a silver G painted on them, to match Gavin’s purple ones. Fucking Gavin. If he’s going to leave, he might as well do it properly. The irregular visits are part of what drives him insane. The fact that one day, Gavin will be the first one in during visiting hours, just to sit there and stare at him. Like he’s either trying to remind himself exactly why there’s bullet proof glass separating them, or confirming the fact that they both still exist, even if they’re no longer just an arm’s reach or a phone call away. “…Ach. Daryan,” he always mutters, sounding angry, hurt, upset, relieved and so very lonely. Gavin continues, mostly to himself, in German. The words are harder to translate now, because it’s been such a long time since he’s heard the language. It’s not like he’d even spoken it himself, but Gavin’s constant use of it had gotten him to the point where he could understand it. He’s lost that now and looking at the lines on Gavin’s face, he knows it’s not the only thing he’s lost. “So. Miss me?” Sometimes, the question makes Gavin leave right away. Without a word. Other times, it makes him frown a little less. Makes him reach out and press his hand against the glass. Always his right hand. He shuts his eyes with a sigh and replies, “Like mad. I’m living without my right hand, Daryan.” The chance that he’ll get the second response always makes it worth it. “You’re a murderer,” Gavin whispers, reminding himself. There is no response. No denial, no confirmation. No pleas for forgiveness. The blond looks up. “You killed a man in cold blood and I still feel incomplete, because it’s a part of me behind bars here. How does that work?” His fingers itch. For music. For Gavin. He keeps them still and shrugs with a smirk. It’s the closest thing to a poker face that he’s got. “Dunno, Gavin. Sounds like you’re being an idiot.” “And whose fault is that?” “Yours?” The grin widens. Gavin gets to his feet. Their eyes meet and then they’re both standing, staring each other down. “One year, eight months, two weeks and four days. I have to wait that long before I can beat the shit out of you.” He blinks, taking a moment to realise what Gavin’s counting down to. The blond looks away with a frown. “…I have to wait that long before I can touch you again at all. I’m looking forward to it as though it’s the day when I will be set free. What kind of fool have you turned me into?” “Heh. You make it sound like you’re in love with me, Gavin.” “I hate you.” “Love you too.” Gavin turns to the guard, ready to leave. Unimpressed. The itch in his fingers becomes harder to ignore. His eyes are fixed on Gavin’s back, seeing through the jacket, the shirt, the pleasant front he puts up in front of everyone. He thinks of the time when they’d had a little too much to drink and ended up collaborating on a song in the spur of the moment. He can see it clearly in his mind; the delighted sparkle in Gavin’s eyes, the way his fingers move, the blond hair falling messily down his shoulders instead of being twisted into that stupid drill. “Klavier.” The word comes out before he can even make the conscious decision to stop himself. Gavin stops and turns. They look at each other. His fingers twitch. “Jam with me.” “What…?” “You, me, guitar, bass. Sing if you want. I just… please.” “The band’s finished, Daryan.” “I know that. But… we can still…” “No.” He clenches and unclenches his hands into fists by his sides. As subtly as he can. Gavin sighs. He returns to the glass wall between them, pressing his right hand against it. “One year, eight months, two weeks and four days.” “Is that a promise?” Gavin turns to leave again. “I’ll see you later, Daryan.”

x

Comments

[shahni.livejournal.com]

PLACEHOLDER BECAUSE I HAVE READ THIS FIC AND I WILL LOVE ON IT WHEN I AM MORE AWAKE. All I have to say right now is VERY. VERY YES.

slkdgklsdjgl I love these two thank you for keeping them wonderfully in character, aaaaah ♥ /fangirls

[kiyala.livejournal.com]

^__^ Even this kind of love is appreciated! Thank you :D

[criminalize.livejournal.com]

What kind of fool have you turned me into?”

“Heh. You make it sound like you’re in love with me, Gavin.”

Oh my God I died.

[kiyala.livejournal.com]

^^ May I assume it was a good kind of death?

[criminalize.livejournal.com]

Most definitely yes yes YES. D: ♥

[kiyala.livejournal.com]

Hee, good to know ♥

[josshouse.livejournal.com]

Oh GAWD. Wonderful fic!

[kiyala.livejournal.com]

Thank you! :3

[epidemically.livejournal.com]

Oh God, I ♥ you so bad. The characterisation of them both is fabulous, but Daryan in particular made me melt a little, and was nicely paced. Little things, too, like their impending 'final jam' really made this. Great job.

[kiyala.livejournal.com]

:D Thank you! I'm really glad you enjoyed it - and glad that you liked my characterisation of Daryan. He's my favourite, so I tried a little harder to portray him right ^^

[cosmiko-ling.livejournal.com]

(Came here from gyakuten_saiban.)

I like this. I like the hurt and the longing bubbling under it.

[kiyala.livejournal.com]

Thank you! :)

[rocks-not-dead.livejournal.com]

Gawd. This was beautiful. *loves* Guh, those poor boys. Heh, Loved it.

[kiyala.livejournal.com]

Thanks! :) Heee, it makes me happy to know that people are still reading D/K! :D

[rocks-not-dead.livejournal.com]

Heh, who wouldn't want to follow those two all over the place. XD

[kiyala.livejournal.com]

So true!

Hahaha. Makes me kind of hopeful that there will actually be an audience for the pw_bigbang fic I'm working on xD

[rocks-not-dead.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm sure there will be someone. :) Unfortunately, I'm not an artist. I'm attempting to draw at the moment, but learning in baby steps. I'm a writer at heart.

[kiyala.livejournal.com]

Yay for writers! :D I'm like that too; I scribble some pictures here and there but writing is what I do best ♥

[yu-chan88.livejournal.com]

i'm so glad i didn't read all of your daryanxklavier fics last time, so i've got some left for now :)
know i'm repeating myself but OMGILOVETHEMALLSOOOOMUUUUCCCHHHH irugeotihtlrg

[kiyala.livejournal.com]

Hahahaha :) thank you for leaving all of these comments! I'm glad that you like them!

[yu-chan88.livejournal.com]

"like" is rather understating.. i LOVE them :D